For the love of all things sacred, stop eating Vegemite with a spoon!
1. There’s A LOT that can kill you.
2. If you see a kangaroo out in the wild (or on the street), do NOT go up and pet it.
They are dangerous! They WILL kick you!
3. Yes Australia is more expensive. Be prepared.
4. And no you don’t have to tip us. I mean you can if you want, but don’t.
5. This bird is NOT friendly. If you’re visiting in spring, WATCH YOUR BACK.
6. And these guys – DON’T FEED THEM. EVER.
7. Our coffee is more superior to yours. Definitely try it.
8. And yes our drink sizes and meal portions are significantly smaller.
9. There’s A LOT more to see than Sydney and Melbourne. Trust us.
There’s even more outside the capital cities, too.
10. Be prepared for ALL sorts of weather.
One day sunshine, the next day apocalypse.
11. This is how you eat vegemite. NOT WITH A SPOON!
12. If someone calls you a cunt, it’s not necessarily a bad thing.
13. You’ll learn to understand our accent, but no offense, you’ll never be able to mimic it.
14. ALWAYS SWIM BETWEEN THESE THINGS. ALWAYS.
15. And definitely watch out for these guys on the sand.
Preferably don’t tread on them.
16. Looking for Burger King? It doesn’t exist sorry. Try Hungry Jacks.
17. And if you’re looking for McDonald’s ask for Macca’s.
19. BTW these are our thongs. Yes, they are quite different to yours.
20. ALWAYS opt to have chicken salt on your hot chips. It is DELICIOUS.
Hot chips = fries btw.
21. Make sure you pack as many packets of these babies into your bag before you leave.
22. If you’re after cheap alcohol, may we recommend these delicious beverages?
Goon and Passion Pop. Just try it at least.