A Very Helpful Guide For All Americans Travelling To Australia

For the love of all things sacred, stop eating Vegemite with a spoon!

1. There’s A LOT that can kill you.

There's A LOT that can kill you.

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2. If you see a kangaroo out in the wild (or on the street), do NOT go up and pet it.

If you see a kangaroo out in the wild (or on the street), do NOT go up and pet it.

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They are dangerous! They WILL kick you!

3. Yes Australia is more expensive. Be prepared.

4. And no you don’t have to tip us. I mean you can if you want, but don’t.

And no you don't have to tip us. I mean you can if you want, but don't.

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5. This bird is NOT friendly. If you’re visiting in spring, WATCH YOUR BACK.

This bird is NOT friendly. If you're visiting in spring, WATCH YOUR BACK.

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6. And these guys – DON’T FEED THEM. EVER.

And these guys - DON'T FEED THEM. EVER.

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7. Our coffee is more superior to yours. Definitely try it.

Our coffee is more superior to yours. Definitely try it.

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8. And yes our drink sizes and meal portions are significantly smaller.

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9. There’s A LOT more to see than Sydney and Melbourne. Trust us.

There’s even more outside the capital cities, too.

10. Be prepared for ALL sorts of weather.

Be prepared for ALL sorts of weather.

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One day sunshine, the next day apocalypse.

11. This is how you eat vegemite. NOT WITH A SPOON!

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12. If someone calls you a cunt, it’s not necessarily a bad thing.

13. You’ll learn to understand our accent, but no offense, you’ll never be able to mimic it.

You'll learn to understand our accent, but no offense, you'll never be able to mimic it.

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14. ALWAYS SWIM BETWEEN THESE THINGS. ALWAYS.

15. And definitely watch out for these guys on the sand.

Preferably don’t tread on them.

16. Looking for Burger King? It doesn’t exist sorry. Try Hungry Jacks.

Looking for Burger King? It doesn't exist sorry. Try Hungry Jacks.

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17. And if you’re looking for McDonald’s ask for Macca’s.

And if you're looking for McDonald's ask for Macca's.

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18. If you hear someone say “He’s such a bogan hey?” they generally mean “That guy is definitely a redneck.”

19. BTW these are our thongs. Yes, they are quite different to yours.

Flickr: Louise / Creative Commons / Via Flickr: louisebrouwers

Flickr: Sandi Hagan / Creative commons / Via Flickr: picable

20. ALWAYS opt to have chicken salt on your hot chips. It is DELICIOUS.

Hot chips = fries btw.

21. Make sure you pack as many packets of these babies into your bag before you leave.

Make sure you pack as many packets of these babies into your bag before you leave.

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22. If you’re after cheap alcohol, may we recommend these delicious beverages?

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Goon and Passion Pop. Just try it at least.

23. And as a final warning, don’t walk under big trees… because the drop bears will get you.

And as a final warning, don't walk under big trees... because the drop bears will get you.

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