While the occasional white lie here and there isn’t too terrible, becoming a frequent liar is a clear and distinct line that should never be crossed.
Even if it’s not their intention, liars destroy trust and won’t ever be able to maintain a healthy relationship for long.
You can catch a liar in their tracks by being aware of typical characteristics liars have. Here are 10 things all liars have in common that you should watch out for:
1. Liars are controlling
One of the reasons people lie is to control how someone else feels. By making up something or stretching the truth, liars can manipulate how their listeners will react, especially if they know their audience well.
2. Liars are insecure
Spreading lies and rumors might be a way for them to connect with others and feel better about themselves. Frequent liars also might lie about their characteristics to boost their suffering ego.
3. Liars hide their feelings
Liars don’t only hide the truth; they hide their feelings, too. They lie to avoid facing the facts.
4. Liars are good listeners
Despite what people might think, good liars know how to listen. It gives them information they can use in the future. They’ll know what lies you’ll be likely to believe. And by studying you, they will know exactly what to say to manipulate your actions and emotions.
5. Liars are charismatic
Liars smile, nod, lean forward and make eye contact while listening – characteristics that are often associated with honest and friendly people. Don’t be fooled by this; their charm is just a cover.
6. Liars think fast
“Ums” and “uhs” are dead giveaways of a lie, so frequent liars have learned how to think fast. Liars are good at being on their toes to avoid being caught in a fib.
7. Liars blame others
It’s easy to take the attention off themselves when they can blame someone else. To help you figure out what’s true, always make sure you go directly to the source for information rather than believing every rumor you hear.
8. Liars have a good memory
Good liars can remember the tiniest of details to keep themselves from contradicting their previous lies.
The less they talk, the fewer lies they have to remember. Even though good liars can remember small details, they know it’s best to avoid getting tangled up in too much information. Liars will also purposefully leave details out of their fabricated stories as a way to manipulate you. Remember: not telling the whole truth is still considered lying.
10. Liars are hurting inside
Before you lash out and accuse someone for lying, think about why they might be lying. Could they be covering up pain? Are they trying to avoid a negative consequence? Are they trying to spare themselves embarrassment? They could be hurting inside, and their lies just might be a cry for help.
If you suspect a close friend or loved one is regularly lying to you, talk to them about it. Try to help them get to the root of the issue before it gets out of hand. When you make yourself a loving source they can confide in, you can help break their nasty habit and build trust in your relationship.